woot still havent touch much assignments XD im lookin for the executioner who would chop mi head off witha "F" stick.
den i think afta dis course and ns wad would i wanna do? should i do a 9-5 work-my-ass-off job? i dont think it suits my low boredom capacity or freelance something... er... dunno...
Somehow i just wanta work a little, maybe some freelance + restuarant. So that i have just enough to travel then go to a country and soak da stuff up, no expensive hotels and fancy food, just plain jungle (literally or methephorically).
This is provided i dont have commitments........ yet i still think of that someone, if i EVER get to be with her... wont it jus spoil da cool, dreamy yet realistically possible vision i have?
and damn, why must i stay a "sister" when all i really want is to care for her and be with her as "more den friends"? is it because i try to care too much? is it because i act like a sissy (somehow that wont cross my mind)? is it because nerdy look + nerdy knowledge + nerdy body = sister material? is it not possible to ever have a little "incest" and love me as a man? im still waiting for a miracle, how dumb, who isnt?T-T
Life is full of rights and little wrongs,You just have to be wrong to stand out and be successful.
a leaf fell on 2:24 am
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ahaha ahaha, lala dum dum la,
jhish jhish ponkalonk bahm bahm
dm da dm, dm dm da dm, dm da dm dm da da dm
a leaf fell on 1:10 am
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one bad incident leads to the next, and to the next, and so on... from a happy-go-lucky guy, i have become vulgar, despicably rude, and downright F'ed up.
I won't blame fate for it is a transient theory,
I won't blame circumstances for I chose them,
I won't blame life for it is my own.
All there is to blame is my very being, how painful it is to try and change, how sad it is I am goine downward. I thank all who would support me, you rock me world =), as well as all who would push me down and make me drown, you rock my world too =)
sorry if i've offended anyone in class or my sec sch mates, im pretty messed up right now, forgive a broken soul.
zzz i sound so wrong... why is everything wrong... i can't cry anymore... it hurts... it hurts...
a leaf fell on 12:34 am
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You always hear your mother say... "EH! Stop playing la, go slp"... "No work to do ar? Your course so slack wan..."
when you play dota you learn a few things about life...
things like working as a team, knowing when to take opportunities, integrity of not cheating (tio disqualified you can go suck thumb) etc. etc.
BUT the biggest thing you learn in DOTA is that life can be related to the seemingly unreality of the game!!
When Sentinel = Life
and Me = Meng
Lose yur handphone = Life has just pawned Meng for 100 gold!
Fuck up your assignments = Life has just pawned Meng for 100 gold! DOUBLE KILL
Fuck and screw up whenever you talk to the girl you like = Life has just pawned Meng... again... lalala... blahblah for 100 gold! TRIPLE KILL
Lose DOTA at second round = Life (or rather pros) has just pawned Meng (I swear it gets boring Q('-' Q)) for 100 gold! TRIPLE KILL (ought to have QUADRUPLE KILL)
Lose yur wallet = Life has just pawned Meng (wadz new? =.=) for... lets give Life 200 gold this time(since its a wallet eh?) =)! TRIPLE KILL, ROCK YOUR WORLD, KICK SOME BALLS
Lose yur Sanity(maybe in the near fucking future) =
Mengzi: gg
Life: NOOB, LEAVER, SMLJ????
Mengzi: I give the fucking up mister life =)
Life: I dont give a fuck... WOOT
Mengzi: dont like dat lehz... own liao dun nid xiao zhang...
Life: I like eh? Go suck thumb la NOOB
So you can see so clearly how DOTA can be related to life =)
gl gf
a leaf fell on 12:41 am
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one wave to another, but the boat stays adrift
one way or another, must my heart stay a rift?
-
adrift in a rift, mengA day passes into the next as i live through the sufferings and small happiness of life, time flows, leaving everything behind except for the self and the memories of the container. From whence i came to when i leave, will the carvings of time imprint my existence into the stone? Even then the weathering slowly fades the lines and eventually carvings turn to dust...
Not mattering on the self existence, must i paint the emptiness of one in this tapestry that runs as long as i exist, will there never be the entwinment of a line that runs so parallel with all others?
Yaaar if you dun understand the shit up there... its ok XD somehow i just typed that out from feeling what i felt... just enjoy the cool phrase of
Adrift in a rift =)
a leaf fell on 1:39 am
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todae is the day before tuesday which is the day... of visual efx... AHHHRHRHRHR save me mama..... haven't do much sia... gg liao
den i ate vegetarian and went to pray at tang zhu (temple master) fo tang (temple)
(and hug buddha's leg in the meantime also XD) because its the 15th day of lunar calendar and er.. the first day of "summer"... (frankly i really dunno how to gauge the lunar calendar =.=)
when i'm there i feel that actually my worries are small and insignificant when im praying, the tranquility of my state of mind and friendliness of fellow er.. practitioners just makes you not able to worry bout any shit!!! but sian after come out start worrying about shit again...
oh yar i'm also planning to go learn cook vegetarian so feel free to ask and try my nice delicious first timed cooked food XD........ soon soon...
a leaf fell on 11:12 pm
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waking up from my drowsy sleep... i walk to the kitchen have a cup of water, walk back to my room, plop!
wake up in da afternoon, walk to the kitchen have another cup of water walk back to my room and sit down in front of the computer... stone. Go back to kitchen cook some fried rice with carrots, french beans, and luncheon meat, eat... go back to room... plop!
wake up at night, i suddenly think of her, as well as all the other girls i've liked, how each and every failure would set me back and make me ever more afraid to step out...
remembering year 1 when i thought finally i would have someone to love, something to be proud of, as i lay in the spiderweb at marina bay... till the night i felt my dumbness, that i was never there, and then, i was afraid to be there anymore, because it hurts, because it sucks...
i couldn't be the one you loved, and it became so hard to be the one you friended.
till recently by flux we talked online, and you've changed so much... i think. i tried to become once again the one you would friend... but it seems how i tried my old feelings for the old you would surface... and then i will have to go, for im... afraid yet again...
its raining here, the thunder i hear,i want you here, to hold you dear.-pine, meng
a leaf fell on 8:25 pm
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gawd... sick for 5 days running... from fever and sore throat to blocked/running nose and cough... life is pretty shack...
a leaf fell on 12:11 am
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Haish... lost mi phone... society nowadays... SHOULD JUST GO BANG WALL...
I helping Kevin (Not OH or HO) act as a dumb army dood, so i try on my army clothes and left the fone on the handicap toilet ledge...
Go out and got a drink den on the way back remembered... GG REA!!! in 10 mins some guy owned my phone and ran away wid my SIM card.
Advice for would be phone stealers... can you at least leave the bladdy SIM card behind? You dumb shits ever think how painstaking it is to get all numbers back into a phone? You can even leave a note
"To the sad owner of phone. Sorry but i think your phone can be sold for some pocket money, But your SIM card is worthless to me as much as mine is to you, so I'll kindly leave it here for your collection unless some other dumb shit wants a SIM card for no apparent reason
Yours Sincerely,
Dood who stole your phone"
and...
SIANNNNNNNN! just when i want to pia work, suddenly down with fever and sore throat!!! Can i like get excuse to pass up later... =.=
*Cough cough*
a leaf fell on 11:30 am
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